Public Safety Joke

EDIT: So apparently, only the Coffrin kids are in on it. Someone is sponsoring "The I Am The Coffrin Toucher And There's Nothing You Can Do About It Party." It is describes as such: Dress up like the Coffrin Toucher - aka, girls, wear your normal clothes - and come drink some brewskis in the cool girls' room. Seriously - popped collars, pearl earrings and ribbons only."

This is going to be the joke of the school. Credit to public safety for taking this seriously and doing what they need to do, though.

On Saturday, April 7, 2007, at approximately 4:30 a.m., an intruder entered the room of a male student in Coffrin Hall. The resident was asleep when he woke to realize that a person was standing over him. This unknown female climbed on top of him and kissed and touched him. He was able to jump out of bed and move away from the female. He yelled at her, and she left the room.

The victim described the female suspect as follows:

White female, “college age”, 5’6”, muscular athletic build with shoulder length dark blonde or brown hair. She was wearing a white ribbon in her hair with a bow at the top of her head. The ribbon was holding a small strand of hair taken from the rest of the hair. She was wearing pearl post earrings, a blue and white striped rugby-type polo shirt with horizontal stripes and blue jeans.